Sunday, July 01, 2007

Self-work makes sense

Many single parents feel this powerful tug. It is the tug of needing to get into a relationship. There is a belief attached to this tug. The belief is that when a relationship is struck up, then there will be happiness and satisfaction. There will finally be some help with parenting. There will financial help. There will be companionship that cna be counted on.

This tug makes a lot of sense. However, this tug can get so intoxicating that the most important thing can be forgotten: yourself.

What cannot be forgotten in the single parenting life is the self-work. This comes in two forms. First, self-work is similar to character development, self-discipine, and self-confrontation. These are hard things. and it may seem that the hard work of healing is work enough. Thing is, these are the same thing.

Second, self-work is taking time to be a human. That might mean NOT being a parent for a few moments and instead spend some time being a person. You might need some decent childcare in order to pull this off, but it will be worth it.

Self-work through discpline and treating yourself will go a long way to toward preparing you for that wonderful person who might be coming your way. At the same time, it will prepare you for being on your own should that person not come your way. It's a no lose way to live.